Change For The Busy
See if you can relate to this...
You have a mental (or written) list of a few things you would ideally like to do for yourself, if only you weren’t already so busy.
You can sense how helpful these things would be, when it comes to you evolving and create change in your life. You often wish you had time to do them. But you are already at capacity with life, so you just can’t.
The other things you must do, right!? Work, family, cooking, cleaning, chores, sleep, general life admin, collapsing in a heap for 10 mins of mindlessness before bed…
They are non-negotiable. It is impossible for you to reprioritise, so you just accept that there isn’t time for that transformative other stuff.
Does this sound familiar?
So you keep ploughing through your never ending to-do list, feeling well over capacity with it all. But what if the most important thing for you to do, is that other stuff?! Sure, it doesn’t scream with urgency, the way all the other bits do, but it does quietly whisper about its importance!
Perhaps the most important thing is finding your way to the other side of the belief that you don’t have the time.
Here’s a vital piece of information that you may not have previously considered:
What if there is a part of you that is scared of making those changes, so that part of you speaks very loudly about the importance of the other things. Creating the illusion that they are non-negotiable, so that you won’t do anything that falls into the category of unknown and therefore scary. So it very successfully prevents you from sticking your neck out and stepping into that glorious, but scary version of you that you’ve yet to become?
Ooh…
Let’s just consider that possibility for a minute.
The possibility that we have all learnt habitual ways of thinking that were designed to keep us safe when we were younger. They come from a part of us that wants to protect us from pain, shame, disappointment, embarrassment and so on. And this part of us is good at running the show. Even when other parts of us really want to create change. This part is still carrying wounds of not feeling good enough from the past and has no idea how incredibly resourceful and resilient an adult you actually are.
So, if that were the case, to get to the other side, we have to meet this protective part of us. Hear it out. Understand how it is trying to protect us and negotiate with it a little! Work with it to come up with a new plan for staying safe that allows you room to evolve too. Sit with some uncomfortable feelings, the stress about being on top of everything, the procrastination, the self doubt and get to the root of the habitual patterns of behaviour. Only then is sustainable change possible.
I know very well how EASY is is to create a list of really important things that we ought to be doing, which we give priority over finding our way to this version of ourselves, because I have been there myself. I have also compassionately called out the protective part that created the belief and I know that you can too. It is totally worth the inner reflection and the uncomfortable feelings to find the freedom that is on the other side.
Yes, it feels very believable that we are already at capacity and can’t change what we are doing. We are too busy doing X. But what if we knew that X was made much easier by finding our way to a new version our ourselves? Wouldn’t spending that time make sense suddenly?
From that position, we would find it so much easier to:
- Do our work.
- Create better relationships
- Be better parents.
- Have better creative ideas for our businesses.
- Improve our health.
- Be happier with ourselves.
- Improve the things we’d like to change about the world.
- Feel like we are on-top of life (or at least feel more at peace with how we are doing)
- Earn more money.
Or whatever X important thing is for you!
And don’t you DESERVE to put yourself high enough on your priority list to find the time for this?
Taking this step may feel nerve wracking, which is why I would encourage you to seek the support of a coach like myself to be with you on this journey. To help you to question the beliefs you have in place that are so firmly rooted, that you might not be able to see the wriggle room for yourself.